(photo credit to : pinterest id)

A Place at The Table 

[Words : Shirley Erena Murray]

For everyone born, a place at the table,
for everyone born, clean water and bread,
a shelter, a space, a safe place for growing,
for everyone born, a star overhead,
                and God will delight when we are creators
                of justice and joy, compassion and peace:
                yes, God will delight when we are creators
                of justice, justice and joy!

For woman and man, a place at the table,
revising the roles, deciding the share,
with wisdom and grace, dividing the power,
for woman and man, a system that's fair,
                and God will delight when we are creators
                of justice and joy, compassion and peace:
                yes, God will delight when we are creators
                of justice, justice and joy!

For young and for old, a place at the table,
a voice to be heard, a part in the song,
the hands of a child in hands that are wrinkled,
for young and for old, the right to belong,
                and God will delight when we are creators
                of justice and joy, compassion and peace:
                yes, God will delight when we are creators
                of justice, justice and joy!

For just and unjust, a place at the table,
abuser, abused, with need to forgive,
in anger, in hurt, a mindset of mercy,
for just and unjust, a new way to live,
                and God will delight when we are creators
                of justice and joy, compassion and peace:
                yes, God will delight when we are creators
                of justice, justice and joy!

For everyone born, a place at the table,
to live without fear, and simply to be,
to work, to speak out, to witness and worship,
for everyone born, the right to be free,
                and God will delight when we are creators
                of justice and joy, compassion and peace:
                yes, God will delight when we are creators
                of justice, justice and joy!

 

photo credit to : pinterest.com

Not The Light but The Darkness of Hope

A

ku berjalan dalam kegelapan, berusaha mencari sedikit cahaya setidaknya hanya untuk menunjukan tanda aku masih dapat hidup di dunia ini. Namun, cahaya yang datang membuat kegelapan ini menjadi remang, membuat aku bertanya lebih jauh lagi, namanya juga manusia, hidup dalam rasa penasaran dan ketidakpuasan, sebelumnya aku meminta sedikit cahaya agar dapat menunjukan sesuatu yang dapat aku sebut “harapan” namun sekarang semakin setiap satu angka bertambah dalam usia kegelapan ku cahaya yang perlahan masuk dalam ruang gelap ku mulai memunculkan pertanyaan lain yang aku maksudkan diatas, “apakah cahaya ini menuntunku ke jalanku ataukah cahaya ini justru menunjukan aku bahwa aku harus mencari jalan lain atau dengan kata lain aku harus berubah ?” hingga saat ini menurutku cahaya itu merupakan cahaya yang menuntunku ke arah yang aku harapkan akan seperti apa seorang “Grace” kedepannya.

Kepala ini terus berpikir dan berpikir tanpa henti, apapun yang menyentuh aku akan masuk dalam pikiran ku, salah satu teman pernah memanggil ku “thinker” lalu apakah aku salah dengan pribadi tersebut ? seakan dunia inii tidak mampu menampung setiap pertanyaan yang keluar dari kepalaku, mereka menjauh entah karena mereka membenci pertanyaan yang keluar dari kepala ini atau mereka takut mennghadapi kenyataan dari hasil jawaban pertanyaan yang keluar dari kepala ku, terkadang aku merasa pikiran ku begitu rumit dan memberatkan hidup ini, disisi lain aku berpikir juga apakah ada perempuan lain di luar sana yang berpikir seperti aku, disaat semua orang tertawa melihat aku berjalan dalam kegelapan namun aku tetap berjalan dan meraba-raba, apakah ini salah ? apakah salah untuk mempertanyakan mengapa segala sesuatu terjadi dalam hidup ini ? mengapa pikirn ini mudah sekali bertanya ? apakah semuanya akan selesai dengan hanya bertanya ? kemana pertanyaan-pertanyaan ini akan membawa ku ? aku mulai lagi bertanya banyak.

Dunia mengalami krisis, banyak jiwa menangis kela[aran, ingin ku memberikan mereka sedikit harapan yang aku punya,factor keserakahan dan perkembangan pesat teknologi dengan ketidak sigapan SDM saat ini menghadapi perkembangan ini membuat semuanya terasa salah, aku juga tidak mengerti mengapa aku berpikir untuk dunia sebesar ini , sedangkan keberadaan ku haya bagaikan satu butir pasir di padang gurun, apa arti ku bagi dunia ini sehingga aku memasukannya dalam daftar “sesuatu yang harus kupikirkan ?”, jaminan bahwa dengan memikirkan dunia ini aku akan menemukan cahaya kebenaranku saja tidak ku dapatkan, masih berjalan dalam kegelapan.

Sampai kapan kegelapan ini terus memenuhi ku ?. aku ingin menjadi perempuan hebat yang memiliki usaha hidup sendiri, hidup dengan bebas atau bisa dibilang “a girl living in Freedom World”,hidup non-conformise, hidup dengan selalu percaya pada Tuhan Yesus ,seorang perempuan yang memperjuangkan perdamaian meskipun orang berkata itu mustahil, memiliki pengetahuan seluas oksigen beredar didunia ini, memiliki hati melayani sebesar hati Bapa agar mampu menjadi berkat bagi yang makhluk ciptaan-Nya yang lain, sehingga keberadaan ku di dunia ini bukan hanya sebutir pasir yang saat ditiup angina dan menghilang tidak akan berarti apa-apa untuk padang gurun tersebut, aku ingin menjadi seorang ibu, sosok yang sangat berarti, sosok yang melewati kesakitan dan rela mempertaruhkan hidupnya untuk memberikan satu kehidupan baru bagi anaknya, sebegitu besarkah pengorbanan yang harus aku berikan untuk mencapai sosok bukan wanita tapi perempuan yang aku inginkan.

Dalam pikiran ku dan yang aku yakini,dalam lirik lagu juga serinag berkata “kita tidak kaya namun kita ini sangat berharga” namun dunia menunjukan kenyataan menakutkan yang mengatakan uang adalah segalanya, lalu apa artinya kalimat yang menjadi harapanku tadi ?, aku akan terus menjelajahi dunia ini hingga aku menemukan jawaban atas pertanyaanku diatas tadi, apakah uang adalah segalanya ? apakah aku masih dapat terus memegang kelaimat harapanku tadi ?, aku yakin dan percaya Bapa di Sorga menjadikanku seorang “thinker” bukan karena sengaja, rencanya tidak ada yang dilepasnya begitu saja, dia betanggung jawab penuh dan selalu menunjakn keindahan disetiap rencananya, aku yakin semua pertanyaan-pertanyaan ku saat ini, kegelapan ku saat ini dan sebongkah cahaya yang menuntunku saat ini merupakan cahaya pengharapan yang dibangun dari iman ku kepada-Nya, sulit menunjukan semua ini dalam kenyataan, kenyataan yang ada justru memaksa ku meninggalkan harapan itu, namun aku tetap percaya dan menanti hasil atau jawaban dari semua pertanyaan yang ada di kepalaku saat ini dan mari kita nantikan akan jadi apa seorang grace yang sudah menemukan berjuta bahkan berlaksa bingkah cahaya nanti ? aku juga meyakini bahwa kegelapan akan tetap ada dalam hidup ku, karena aku tidak akan pernah melihat cahaya yang aku percaya sebagai harapan disaat tidak ada kegelapan, sebaliknya karena adanya kegelapan aku mampu melihat harapan dalam hidup ini. Jadi kepala ini tidak akan pernah berhenti bertanya namun perlahan satu persatu pertanyaan akan dijawab dan akan aku temukan siapa Grace sebenarnya dan siapa sosok perempuan yang terbentuk dalam hidup seorang grace J

-Peace in the heart-

-G-

(Monday, December 28th, 2015

3:00 am)

I Am Me, Grace.

                                                                 Photo Credit to

                                            http://www.brit.co/back-to-school-desktop-wallpapers/ 

Wanna know about me ? this is my freedom life that i want to share, read and understand, thanks before.

Grace or just Ghe, that’s how my friends call me. People in my hometown really love my presence among them, because they think that my personality is good like joyful and really talk-active so it can make a great atmosphere when they’re playing around me. People do know me as a little girl who loves singing, since 2000 I’ve already joined Reform Church’s Youth Vocal Group and Sola Gracia Choir in Kupang City, and in my freshyear being in Salatiga, I’ve joined Magnificat Youth Choir in GKI Jendral Sudirman Salatiga City.

First thing about my personality, I do really know as a tomboy, love eccentric and bohemian style, and also known as obstinate girl, discipline and of course perfectionist; but for me, I am a girl who think free, I have a quote that really inspiring me “Freedom is state of mind”, that quote define something to me that every single thing that I do and I feel start from my mind, every perception built are come from my mindset, that’s why I have to free my mind or my idea so I can learn a lot of things and become a person that the world need, but in the other hand, I do have some principles that the freedom of my mind should come with responsibility for what I think and what I’ve done, so I can limit for things that I can and cannot do. Why I put a limit at my mind (even though I said that it’s free) because I believe that when I make something excessive, it goes wrong way. That limit too, that makes me really hard to put my trust in someone.

 Second thing about me is I really love music, and I really care about my Mp3 player or Hand phone playlist, cause I do believe that someone‘s playlist define how his/her personality. I can’t cook, but someday I will learn to cook so someone that marrying me in the future will be proud of having me. The other things are, I love to read about bible story, philosophy and I do feel really interesting with Gender Study and Semiotics (it begins when I started studying communication). I am a blogger too because I love writing and sharing, self-supporting, extravagant, but I’m still learning to control how i spend my money, I love blue and black color. I love to be a radio broadcaster and public speaking so much, and that’s a dream for me to make my own production house at my hometown, so that I can expose my hometown like the other media have done nowadays for west part of Indonesia. I have a dream to work at a LSM company or PPB so I can help the poor people in my hometown, and use my media knowledge to support my job to be better.

For Me, Jesus is first priority and the second is my family. In my life I always keep the faith like that and my favorite scripture is Ephesians 2 : 8 “ For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God”, have become my first reason to always keep the faith in the Lord.  Sometimes, there’s a lot of things that happened in my life  shakes my faith, and many people talk behind me about my personality that makes me always feel my faith is wrong and what I keep in or hold on now are wrong, they said that I have always been obstinate and don’t even want to listening to advice of others, but for me, to build my leadership personality I have to stay consistent but it doesn’t mean that I am obstinate, I do listening to other people advice but I don’t follow it straightly,  It’s like I have to consider it first “is it make sense or not?”; after all I can see those people who show me their integrity between what they’ve said and what they’ve done. The hardest time that makes me feel it that way is now, me being in college; but thank God I’m really close to my parents so they help me get through this by guiding me to rebuild my faith and not getting shake anymore, they’ve always been my best friend who always hear about my situations and always give me the right solution to pray and read the bible. I believe all the process that I’ve been, will guide me to become a better Grace for the world in the future. 

My mother for me is everything, always be my first place to comeback when the world makes me sad or happy. Eventhough now the distance separate us, but her love and how she taking care of me always makes me missing home and sometimes when I forget to call home it will make her feel sad and when I call she will say things like “Where have you been my little girl? Why don’t you call home? We miss you.” listen to that simple words always make me feel motivated and  remember that they always waiting for me to come back home with a million achievement and make them proud.

Sister and little brother, are the perfect gift that Jesus gave into my life, their presence become my motivation and entertain me whole time. They are the part of my soul who really know me so well and better than anyone in this world, we know each other like the back on our hand. My two little brothers always show their curiosity about my life in Salatiga and when I say it’s dangerous to living my life here they would say that they want to be my keeper, the innocent part of them are my motivation. For my two beautiful sisters, they are my main inspiration in this world, how they build their independent life and how they can graduate at the right time, and  right now they can save some money of their salary for our parents in their 20s. They are the perfect inspiration for me to become a better person in the future, can I be like them ? of course, because for me everything that I do now in my current town are a special gift that I’ve prepared for my Lord and my parents and a guidance to take me home. This is the most important part of my life.    

Talking about what I’m studying right now, as a communication student, I am really prioritizing my studying process right now, for me that’s the main reason why I came here. Grade Point Average (GPA) is an important thing for me, student nowadays said that GPA it’s not an important thing, and cannot measure how smart someone can be, but for me when you studying with you ethics and with responsibility GPA will be very important to you, it has to be balance between what’s our obligation and our rights as the student, sometimes we ask to much rights without any obligation. That’s why I have to be polite at my class because for me achievement are the important thing and what I do right now are based on the popular bible sentence “Ora et labora”.

Three years being in University make me learn about a lot of things that people never know what is Communication or media studies all about, that’s the luckiest thing that I feel right now, people outside there always think that “Why you should studying about media? While you already live with media?” in their mind, media-studies is a simple theoretical thing that can’t give a guarantee for our future, this is why I am feeling lucky studying about media right now, people never find out what we’re studying, we learn about how people nowadays getting control by the media and how they live in their popular culture, this is the main problem of the world right now, so, how come they said that media-studies it’s not important? Us as media students do have a big responsibility “Where will we bring media?” because right now thousand of people hanging their whole life in media, so where will we bring the media will guide us what our world will be, that’s the biggest part of media-studies that people never realize about it.  When I learn about media, I found out a lot of interesting thing, like gender-media studies and semiotics that show how a media or communication student supposed to think, we should have wide knowledge about world, so we can find out the secret in this world that other people never know. That’s how I see and feel lucky with what I’m studying right now.

Organization experience, I’ve been at Senat Mahasiswa Fakultas 2013-2014 (SMF-FISKOM) internship and took part at Internal and external division, after that legally I’ve become the division leader for professional-skill’s division at SMF 2014-2015, and right now I am part of Advocating division in Badan Perwakilan Mahasiswa Universitas (BPMU). For the external-campus organization, I am part of Indonesian Student Christian Movement Branch of Salatiga (Gerakan Mahasiswa Kristen Indonesia – GMKI). I learned much lessons from organization and it has a big contribution to my personality right now, the main thing that I learn from my organization experience is what i’ve done in there, it’s all about to serve my God not for anyone else, only for God that’s why I have to do it with my whole heart.  

To close this essay about me, I have philosophy quotes that make you understand what I mean “you will never understand how someone feel just by the story, you have to take your own experience so you can truly understand what she/he feel”.

That’s the small part of me, I hope this essay help you to know about my life, thank you for reading, God be with you. Be bless.

-Grace-